Quiet Solitude

Lately I've been spending most of my time at home.  I've noticed that my health has gotten better for the first time this year and my stress levels have started to drop.  I think it's because there are very few stimuli here - it's pretty quiet, even with the cars and trains in the background, there's good light, and best of all, I don't have to talk to anyone.  My husband thinks that I'll get sick of this soon, but I lived like this for a whole month earlier this year and it was one of the best months in a long time.  I think the key might be a combination of independence and safety.  When I'm able to focus on my work without worrying about how I appear to others, I can relax more.  If my fibro or other illnesses act up, I don't have to feel guilty about lying down.  I don't work on anyone's payroll and if I want to go some place like a coffee shop, I can just up and leave.  At the same time, I can hide in my apartment if I want and not worry about visitors.  My husband's presence sort of "wards" the place against any thoughts I might feel about being abandoned or helpless, a reminder that I'm not alone in a negative way.

It's kind of funny to think that bipolar folks include introverted people.  Or maybe it makes sense?  I'm not sure...I've been using the things I read about introvert/extrovert natures to help manage my own condition but sometimes I wonder if my reasoning is valid.  I guess that balance is a good thing and that I should re-insert myself better into society - but do I really have to?