Holding Steady

So far so good on the meds...I still get worried when I get emotional or react in an emotional way that it's my illness talking and not me. Then I get more worried if it *is* me because then meds can't fix it. From time to time I still contemplate suicide and am think of ways that I might end up dying. No matter how you look at it, as strong as the lithium is, it may not be able to erase all suicidality...